Let me ask you a simple question that might make you uncomfortable:
Do you actually need a smartphone?
Not want. Not prefer. Not find convenient. NEED.
I speak with people every day who are desperately trying to escape Big Tech’s grip on their lives. They come to me seeking guidance on GrapheneOS, VPNs, cryptocurrencies, email, and privacy-focused browsers like Brave. These are powerful tools built for specific purposes, but here’s the uncomfortable truth many don’t want to hear:
Many people shouldn’t be using these complex tools at all.
The Complexity Trap
Too often, I watch well-intentioned folks dive headfirst into privacy tools they don’t understand. They’re trying to “de-Google” their phone while still keeping all the conveniences they’ve grown accustomed to.
They want the tool to just work without ever taking the time to understand how or why the tool functions the way it does. They want privacy without sacrifice, security without learning curves.
This approach is like picking up a firearm and wanting to jump into combat without ever going through basic training. It’s dangerous not just to yourself but potentially to those around you.
When I point this out, I’m often met with resistance: “But I never needed to learn how to use my old device… it just worked.”
Exactly.
That’s precisely why your old device has been able to gain access to everything you say and do. It “just works” because it’s designed to extract maximum data while creating minimum friction. The convenience you enjoyed was the bait in an elaborate trap.
Learning how your technology actually works isn’t optional if you truly care about privacy and security. It’s the price of admission.
This misguided approach typically results in one of two outcomes:
- Frustration and abandonment – They give up after hours of troubleshooting, convinced that privacy is “too hard” and not worth the effort. They return to the comfortable surveillance of Big Tech, telling themselves “at least it works.”
- False sense of security – They believe they’re protected when in reality they’ve misconfigured settings or fallen prey to basic security mistakes that leave them more vulnerable than before. This is actually worse than doing nothing, as they take risks they wouldn’t otherwise take, believing they’re “protected”.
It’s like watching someone buy an expensive security system but leaving their front door wide open. The tools themselves aren’t the problem – it’s the fundamental understanding that’s missing.
If you’re not willing to invest time in learning how these tools work, you’re better off with simpler technology or accepting the privacy trade-offs of mainstream devices.
Just as there is not magical solution that offers peak health without minimum effort, there is no magical solution that offers maximum privacy with minimum effort.
The sooner you accept and embrace this paradigm the faster you’ll get yourself healthy and live a more sovereign digital lifestyle.
The Flip Phone Revolution
In my last post I mentioned a young man I met who made a deliberate choice to use a flip phone. Despite his friends laughing at him, he’s one of the most present, engaged, and genuinely happy young adults I’ve encountered.
When I asked why he made the switch, his answers were striking, such as:
“I realized so many around me were living life through a screen, not with their own eyes.”
This young man isn’t anti-technology. He uses a laptop when needed and navigates with a standalone GPS device in his car.
What he rejected wasn’t technology itself, but the constant, addictive tether of the smartphone.
Living Like It’s 1999 (And Loving It)
My wife offers another powerful example of someone who refuses to let her smartphone control her life. She keeps her phone on her desk at home and only checks it when she specifically wants to call someone or has time to respond to messages.
Most importantly – she rarely takes it out of the house.
This behavior drives some of her friends and family crazy. “Why didn’t you respond?” “I’ve been trying to reach you all day!” “What if there was an emergency?”
But her approach has forced our entire family to confront an uncomfortable truth: this is exactly how we ALL lived just 20 years ago, and civilization didn’t collapse. We managed to coordinate plans, handle emergencies, and live perfectly functional lives.
What my wife understands intuitively is that a smartphone is a tool that should serve us – not something we need attached to our bodies 24/7/365. By keeping this physical distance, she enjoys a psychological freedom that most smartphone users have forgotten is even possible.
The Hard Truth About “Needs” vs “Wants”
Society has masterfully blurred the line between necessity and convenience. We’ve collectively bought into the idea that smartphones are essential tools for modern living.
But let’s get brutally honest about what most people actually need:
- The ability to make calls in emergencies
- Occasional text communication
- Basic navigation functions
- Perhaps email access at specific times
Everything else – social media, games, constant news, streaming services, food delivery apps – these are conveniences, not necessities. They’re wants disguised as needs.
Your Laptop Should Be Your Primary Device
Here’s another uncomfortable truth: most of what you’re doing on your smartphone should be done on a laptop instead.
Banking? Do it on your laptop.
Managing finances or crypto? Laptop.
Responding to important emails? Laptop.
Social media? If you must use it at all, do it on your laptop.
When these activities migrate to our phones, they transform from intentional tasks into constant, compulsive behaviors. We check our bank accounts not because we need to, but because we can. We scroll social media not because we’re seeking specific information, but because we have 30 seconds of unoccupied time.
This shift has profound implications for our security and privacy too.
Banking and financial management are inherently safer on a properly secured laptop than on a phone you carry everywhere and connect to countless public WiFi networks.
The Fear of Empty Moments
Have you noticed how uncomfortable people have become with even a few seconds of unoccupied time?
Watch people standing in line at a store, sitting at a restaurant waiting for food, or even walking down the street. The moment there’s a pause in activity or conversation, phones emerge as if pulled by some invisible force.
We’ve lost the capacity to simply exist in a space, to observe our surroundings, to make eye contact with strangers, or to sit quietly with our thoughts. Instead, we dive into our phones seeking something – anything – to entertain and distract us.
This isn’t just sad – it’s rewiring our brains to crave constant stimulation and making us increasingly incapable of deep thought, creativity, or genuine human connection.
The next time you feel that reflexive urge to pull out your phone during a brief lull in activity, resist it. Look around instead. Notice the world. Make eye contact. Smile at someone. Let your mind wander and generate its own thoughts rather than consuming someone else’s.
The Right Tool for Your Actual Life
I recently consulted with a 68-year-old retiree who was struggling with her digital privacy journey. She wanted privacy but was becoming increasingly frustrated with how to do basic navigation on the device, app compatibility issues and the technical aspects of migrating to a new system when everyone around her still lived in the old.
As easy as her old iPhone was, she still struggled with it as well.
After 20 minutes of honest conversation, we reached a conclusion:
A flip phone and a Garmin GPS for her car would serve her actual needs perfectly.
The relief on her face was immediate. She didn’t need a complex privacy solution – she needed a simple tool that worked reliably for her specific life situation.
Ask Yourself These Hard Questions
If you’re considering diving into privacy tools or already struggling with them, pause and honestly answer these questions:
- What functions do I genuinely need my phone to perform?
- Am I willing to invest significant time learning how these privacy tools work at a technical level?
- Would I be happier with simpler technology that does fewer things but does them reliably?
- Am I using complex privacy tools because I need them, or because they make me feel better about using addictive services?
- Am I afraid of trying something new because of what my friends and family may say?
Breaking Free Requires Honesty
The most powerful privacy tool isn’t GrapheneOS, a VPN, encrypted email, or cryptocurrency. It’s honest self-assessment.
Technical solutions can’t save us from our own habits. No amount of privacy-focused apps will reduce screen addiction if we’re unwilling to examine why we reach for our phones dozens (or hundreds) of times each day.
For many – perhaps even most – people, the ideal privacy solution isn’t upgrading to more complex tools, but downgrading to simpler ones.
Imagine the freedom of a device that can’t track your location, can’t bombard you with notifications, can’t algorithmically manipulate your attention, because it simply doesn’t even have the capability to do so.
That freedom is available for about $50-$100 at your local electronics store… or relearning how you engage with the tool you carry around with you all day every day.
The Courage to Be Different
Our society has developed a strange hostility toward those who opt out of smartphone culture. We treat them as backward, difficult, or problematic. Businesses increasingly demand app-based interactions. Friends and family express frustration when someone isn’t instantly reachable.
Swimming against this powerful current requires courage – the courage to say:
“I don’t need to be reachable 24/7.”
“I don’t need instant access to everything.”
“I don’t need constant entertainment and distraction.”
The people I see experiencing the most genuine freedom are often those with the simplest technological setups. They use phones as tools rather than extensions of themselves.
A Challenge, Not a Condemnation
I’m not suggesting everyone should immediately toss their smartphones. That would be impractical for many, particularly those whose work genuinely requires these devices.
What I am suggesting is an honest assessment of whether your current technological tools and applications match your actual needs – not your wants, habits, or social pressures.
For some, GrapheneOS and other advanced privacy tools are the right answer. For others, a basic flip phone and separate GPS might provide not just adequate functionality, but superior peace of mind.
The most privacy-respecting choice might not be a better smartphone – it might be barely having a smartphone at all.
Are you brave enough to consider that possibility for yourself, and/or those you love?